Because you like Randy Marsh in South Park

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Jon Snow
2429

It doesn't matter how noble or brave he is. Jon Snow is a bastard, and people don't let him forget it. See them in Game of Thrones.

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Mark Watney
1018

Stranded on Mars, Mark Watney is armed with quick wits, an electronic diary, disco music, and an undying resolve to make it back. See them in The Martian.

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Elizabeth Bennet
2070

It is a truth universally acknowledged that Elizabeth Bennet doesn't suffer fools or prideful men. See them in Pride & Prejudice.

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Jo March
1470

Fiery, intelligent, and opinionated, Jo March rebels against the restrictions of her era. See them in Little Women.

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Melinda May
1486

Melinda May is a woman of few words and many talents. Most of them martial. See them in Marvel Cinematic Universe.

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Dana Scully
1266

For Dana Scully, sometimes looking for extreme possibilities makes you blind to the probable explanation right in front of you. See them in The X-Files.

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Cookie Lyon
426

She got locked up so her husband could make it big, but now Cookie Lyon is coming for what's hers. See them in Empire.

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Rachel Green
3251

Socialite-turned-runaway-turned-waitress, Rachel Green is the legendary story of riches to rags, trying to work her way up again with the help of her friends. See them in Friends.

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Phoebe Buffay
3674

Phoebe Buffay works as a masseuse while attempting to put her spark in a world where everyone else’s seems to have dulled. See them in Friends.

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Jane Eyre
866

Sharply perceptive and stubbornly principled, Jane Eyre might not have a very loud voice, but she knows when and how to use it. See them in Jane Eyre.

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Susie Salmon
863

Susie Salmon has a big heart, even though it's not beating anymore. See them in The Lovely Bones.

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Aimee Finecky
433

Aimee Finecky has big dreams, but she's too busy taking care of everyone else's desires. See them in The Spectacular Now.