Because you like Pacey Witter in Dawson's Creek

Thor is Asgardian nobility who is tickled by how us earthlings live. See them in Marvel Cinematic Universe.

Not only will attorney Matt Murdock get you off the hook, but his alter ego Daredevil might also swing by later and rough up whoever put you there. See them in Marvel Cinematic Universe.

His murderous megalomania aside, Loki is quite charming. Just don't mention his strapping older brother; he's a tad jealous. See them in Marvel Cinematic Universe.