Aldous Snow

Living… in his “greatest hits era.” Aldous Snow is a famous British rock star who has recently fallen on hard times. His last album, African Child, was pronounced the worst album of the decade, and declared the third worst thing to happen to Africa after famine and war. Unable to deal with the pressure, Aldous has slid into drug addiction and hasn’t played a show in the last three years.

Profession… rock star. Aldous is the lead singer of the band, Infant Sorrow. He’s one of the last members of a dying breed — the ancient class of rock star that plays hard and parties harder. He was a respected figure in the rock world until the release of his latest album. Now he’s a joke.

Interests… drugs and sex, or anything that will distract him from spending time with himself. Aldous is incredibly lonely: his wife left him, he barely gets to see his son, and he is surrounded by dishonest yes-men.

Relationship status… divorced from the famously sexy and risqué pop star, Jackie Q. Their marriage fell apart when Aldous got sober, causing Jackie to call the relationship “boring.” The two split soon after, ironically causing Aldous to fall off the wagon. As a result of his rampant and public drug use, Jackie was granted custody of their son, Naples. Now Aldous sleeps around, but is unable to find anyone who seems interested in him for anything other than his fame.

Challenge… getting to the Greek Theater in Los Angeles. The last time Aldous played the Greek was ten years ago, and it was a sensation that led to the creation of one of the best-selling live albums of all time. Now he has a chance to play another amazing show and perhaps resurrect his career. All he has to do is listen to his handler, Aaron Green, who is helping him get to the theater on time. But for the flighty, distractible and drug-addled Aldous, this is no easy task.

Personality… cheeky, charismatic and constantly sedated. Aldous Snow has been a famous rock star for so long that he doesn’t even have an idea of what it would be like to live a normal life. While he’s hilariously out of touch with reality, he has a good heart, and genuinely seems to value honesty, kindness and loyalty — three traits that are almost impossible to find in his legion of parasitic hangers-on.