Ted

Grew Up… famous. Ted is a teddy bear that gained the ability to move and speak when his lonely owner wished for a best friend for life. He spent his early years in the limelight as a living, breathing miracle.

Living… a lazy life. He spends his days with his best friend and the man who wished upon a star and gave him life: John Bennett. Ted’s fame faded a long time ago, and he now wastes his time smoking pot while watching reruns with John.

Profession… unemployed. As a living teddy bear, there aren’t a ton of opportunities for Ted. He bums off John, who doesn’t mind providing for his oldest and truest friend – although John’s girlfriend is putting increasing amounts of pressure on John to kick Ted out and move on with his life.

Interests… marijuana, Flash Gordon, and sex. Ted looks wholesome and innocent, but he’s picked up some unsavory habits in the last 37 years. If he’s not goofing off with John, chances are he’s flirting with prostitutes or sleeping off his latest bender.

Relationship status… single and sleeping around. Ted isn’t discriminating in his romantic advances and is willing to hump anything that will let him. Despite his lack of standards, Ted has had flings with several beautiful and high-profile women, including Norah Jones.

Challenge… growing up. Ted and John have been living the same aimless, hedonistic lifestyle for the past twenty years, but it can’t last forever. When John’s girlfriend, Lori, convinces him to kick Ted out, he’ll be forced to get a job, live on his own, and let go of John. It’s hard for the pair to spend time apart, and Ted finds himself trying to figure out a way for him and Lori to stay in John’s life simultaneously.

Personality… crude, offensive, and irreverent. As a sentient teddy bear, Ted gets away with things that no human would. A dedicated pleasure seeker, Ted can be nauseatingly selfish. He doesn’t have a lot of ambition or foresight, and doesn’t really see why it’s necessary for John and him to stop doing what they enjoy. Despite his flaws, at heart is a dedicated friend who truly wants John to be happy – he just finds it unlikely that John would be happier without him.