Mary Jensen

Grew Up… in Minnesota and then Cumberland, RI. Mary was very popular in high school, but she never let it go to her head. She was a sweetheart, always looking after her mentally handicapped brother Warren and asking the significantly less cool Ted Stroehmann to prom.

Living… in the swanky Miami bachelorette pad she shares with Magda, an older woman who likes getting tan and getting drunk.

Profession… orthopedic surgeon. A Princeton graduate, Mary is on the fast track to success. She’s just 31, and she’s already got an assistant.

Interests… watching everything from Harold and Maude (she considers it to be the greatest love story of our time) to SportsCenter. A sports fanatic, Mary is highly knowledgeable about football, and she’s a regular at the local driving range. But her real passion is helping those who are mentally disabled. You can find her down where her brother lives at Neary Center For Exceptional People most days handing out lunch to all the residents.

Relationship Status… miraculously, single. After breaking up with her high school boyfriend Woogie, she dated a guy whom she dearly liked named Brett for a good stretch. He was a sweet, corn-fed white boy, but he said he would have already proposed if Warren wasn’t in her life, and that was the end of that. And worse yet, she had a stalker at one point and was forced to change her name.

Challenge… finding Mr. Right. Though she is indecisive when it comes to dating, Mary has a clear mental image of the perfect man: a guy who “can play 36 holes and still have energy to take [her] and Warren to a baseball game, eat a ton of hot dogs and drink beer (not light beer, BEER).”

Personality… sincere, trusting, and generous. Mary is one of the most incredible women you will ever meet. She is humble but also very confident, never getting insecure over what other people might think. Mary is bursting with love. Any man would be lucky to have her.