Martin Moone

Living… with his mom, dad, and three sisters – Trisha, Fidelma, and Sinéad. Oh, and Seán Murphy of course! Who could forget Martin Moone’s imaginary best friend and confidant? Growing up in the tiny, rural town of Boyle, Ireland, during the 1980s isn’t super thrilling, but with Seán around, things are definitely far from boring.

Profession… a frequently bullied student. Life is rough at school when you’re 12 and scrawny. Martin often falls victim to the Bonner brothers, who torment him mercilessly. Luckily, there is a renowned bully protector at school named Declan Mannion who can help him out. But first, Martin has to get Declan a feel of his sister’s boobs.

Interests… drawing cartoons and hanging out with Seán. In other words, Martin spends a lot of time with figments of his own very vivid imagination. What else is there to do for fun in Boyle?

Relationship Status… single. But young Martin has a pretty good idea of how to woo the ladies. Just check out this enchanting bit of prose: “I love your mousy hair, like a beautiful mouse and your pale, blemished skin and your scent. You smell even nicer than…crisps.” (“Crisps” are potato chips to you Americans.)

Challenge… avoiding school bullies, dealing with his sisters’ pranks, training to become an altar boy, etc. With the help and encouragement of Seán, Martin Moone manages to get himself entangled in all sorts of tricky situations. Remember, kids are very susceptible to peer pressure. Even if it is coming from an imaginary friend.

Personality… chipper and compassionate, but slightly dim. Martin is a cheerful boy whose heart is usually in the right place. Unfortunately, his brain almost never is: “Martin was a simple child, the sort of tender boy who’d care for a poor injured chaffinch. Or indeed a deceased chaffinch, thinking it was injured.”