Growing Up… at 671 Lincoln Blvd. in suburban Chicago, with his humongous family (15 people!) in their humongous house (four stories!). Kevin doesn’t get along too well with his family, especially his older brother Buzz and his uncle Frank. Kevin is just 8 years old, but he’s about ready to move out. “This house is so full of people it makes me sick,” he says aloud to himself. “When I grow up and get married, I’m living alone. Did you hear me? I’m living alone!”
Living… alone for the moment. Instead of joining his family for their Christmas vacation in France, Kevin is left behind in his family’s mad rush to catch their plane to France. And to make matters worse, he overhears two burglars’ plot to rob his house.
Interests… plain cheese pizza, microwave mac and cheese, firecrackers and ‘50s doo-wop.
Relationship Status… non-existent. He thinks girls are repulsive. Kevin has just one word for Buzz’s girlfriend: “Woof!”
Challenge… fending off the burglars. He assembles an array of defense mechanisms from simple pranks to complex Rube Goldberg-like contraptions to inflict pain and confusion on the burglars as they attempt to invade his house. But perhaps a more daunting challenge Kevin faces is conquering bigger fears: scary Old Man Marley, who murdered his whole family back in ’58 and still haunts the neighborhood; scary gangster movies; and the scary haunted furnace in the basement.
Personality… creative, quick, and mischievous. Like any kid, he enjoys bouncing on his parents’ bed, roughhousing, and eating junk food. Kevin yearns for the independence of adulthood, and when left to his own devices he relishes the opportunity to partake in various boring adult activities: grocery shopping, setting the table, doing laundry, sawing down the Christmas tree, and especially, shaving.
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