Dwayne Hoover
Photo Credit: Everett Collection

Dwayne Hoover

Breakfast of Champions

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About Him

Living… alone in a dream house in Midland City, your average Midwestern town. Dwayne’s house is in the hottest neighborhood of the city. All the houses, including his, are luxurious and built on at least four acres of land. He even has a maid. He should be pretty happy, right?

Profession… entrepreneur. Dwayne splits his time between his various investments. He owns a Pontiac agency, a piece of the new Holiday Inn, three Burger Chefs, five coin-operated car washes, pieces of the Sugar Creek Drive-In Theatre, the Radio Station WMCY, the Three Maples Par-Three Golf Course, and seventeen hundred shares of common stock in Barrytron, Limited, a local electronics firm. He mostly made his money through the car dealership.

Interests… parking his car in the various parking lots he owns. He turns on the radio, zooms down the Old Country Road, jumps onto Union Avenue, jumps some curbs, pulls into the lot, and relaxes.

Relationship Status… a widow. He is seeing his secretary Francine. She goes to Quality Motor Court with him and asks that he call her "Mommy." She insists on telling Dwayne she loves him, something he explicitly requested she avoid.

Challenge… not losing his mind. Dwayne’s never been more confused. He needs to talk to somebody. He’s amassed so much wealth and very little wisdom. He feels this overwhelming desire for someone to sit him down and tell him what life is all about. Francine says only God has the answers. Where does that leave Dwayne? It’s hard when you’ve achieved the American dream, but it feels more like a nightmare.

Personality… unstable. Dwayne knows he supposedly has it all, but he’s incredibly depressed. He wants to end it all, but somehow life keeps interrupting him. His depression makes him unpleasant to be around, changing his manner from nasty to pitifully dependent in a matter of minutes.

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