Chris Traeger

Living… positively, to the fullest, one day at a time, etc., in Pawnee, Ind. Chris knows he’s lucky to be alive, and the world is even luckier to have him. As he explains, “I was born with a blood disorder and my parents were told I had three weeks to live. And here I still am. Some 2,000 odd weeks later, and I have enjoyed every one of them.” 

Profession… city manager of Pawnee. In theory Chris oversees the entire city’s finances, but the Parks Department and its deputy director Leslie Knope have a special place in his heart. In his words: “As city manager, I play no favorites. But as a private citizen, I’m free to support whomever I choose. And I support Team Knope, because they’re the best! Everybody’s the best. We’re all winners.” 

Interests… health and fitness, and metaphors about health and fitness. Chris likes to take care of his body to the point of obsession, running 10 miles a day every day for 18 years, for a total of 65,000 miles, or one third of the way to the moon. He takes supplements and keeps a strict diet, but there’s no better meal than a huge plate of positive thinking. That’s the key to his success. 

Relationship Status… single, with many prospects. Chris’s problem, as you might have guessed, is that he’s just too perfect. He intimidates any woman who might have an interest in him. Who could possibly match him, physically or mentally? Ann Perkins considered pursuing him, but her interest increased only as Chris revealed more of his dark side. The more he broke down, the more attractive he seemed. It’s hard to truly love a machine. 

Challenge… fine-tuning and upkeep. Think of a well-oiled machine, except better, with amazing pecs. The key to his continued success? Movement. As long as Chris keeps his mind occupied and his body in perfect condition, he will never be crippled with despair. His soul may be a deep, dark place, but he’s completely aware of that fact and happy to ignore it.

Personality… super optimistic and positive, to the point that it can become insufferable. Chris is one of those people who will never admit to having a bad day. He tends to think other people’s problems are actually easily solvable deficiencies, and if they only took the right supplements everything would be all right. Chris genuinely believes he has a chance of living to 150. The average lifespan is for people who don’t want it badly enough.