Ally McBeal

Grew up… with her parents who weren’t in love with each other. When Ally was only three, she walked in on her mom in bed with a man who was not her father. Ally is determined to live her life differently than her parents.

Living… in Boston. Ally’s been here since her time at Harvard Law, where she made Law Review but also experienced her first major heartbreak with her boyfriend Billy Thomas who transferred to Michigan. Ally assumed the distance would provide some closure, but she was horrified to find he is back in Boston. Not only that, but they worked in the same office, along with Billy’s new fiancée. Sometimes the world is just too small.

Profession… lawyer at Cage & Fish. She was on the fast track at another top law firm, but was fired after a partner sexually harassed her. Ally’s classmate from Harvard, Richard Fish, then recruited her to join his practice. It’s an unconventional firm, to say the least. It is filled with quirky personalities including John Gage, a senior partner who whistles out of his nose and has a pet frog named Stefan. And her assistant is Elaine, who has invented the wrinkle-removing Face Bra and the sperm-preserving Cool Cup. Instead of congregating over the water cooler, she and her coworkers meet in a unisex bathroom where they gossip and even perform gymnastics. Although she is close to some of people she works with, she is not sure if she likes practicing law. As she says, “Law and love are the same - romantic in concept but the actual practice can give you a yeast infection.”

Interests... shopping for the shortest skirts possible and dancing with her co-workers at the local bar. 

Relationship Status... ever-changing. Ally is a serial dater and has eclectic taste in men. She has dated a wisecracking rabbi, a nude model from her art class, and a man who always seemed to have mayonnaise on his face. She is determined to find passion and love. But in the meantime, she will make do with her inflatable male doll. He’s always there for her.   

Challenge… her neuroses. Ally’s mind is always racing with worries and insecurities. It’s so bad now that she’s having disturbing visions. For example, when someone breaks up with her, she sees herself being thrown into a dumpster. When she says the wrong thing, her tongue becomes several feet long and drops to the floor. And she can’t stop having hallucinations about dancing babies, which constantly remind her that her biological clock is ticking.

Personality… anxious, emotional, and self-involved but also daring, optimistic, and independent. When you’re with Ally, every conversation always seems to come back to her favorite subject: herself. She does not have a filter and shares way too much of her personal life with others. But even though she does have her neurotic moments, she can get it together when it counts. And she is daring enough to be her own person no matter what anyone else thinks. At heart, she is a dreamer not willing to settle for anything less than the proverbial “true love.” Though if she finally gets happiness, she’ll just worry about being too happy or content.